Blurring Boundaries A JenTilly Fanfic
by xUndefinedx
Summary: A fanfic dedicated to the wonderful "Jelly" - first fanfic I've done in a long while, reviews welcome!
1. Chapter 1

**Authors note**: It's my first time using this site and so, other than previously becoming an official addictee to the hollyfiction forum on the Hollyoaks website (that is no more :'() this is my first proper fanfiction in a loooooooong time - go easy on me! I really enjoy this coupling on HO and if I'm honest, it pretty much reacquainted me with the programme! So, please do read on if like me, you are suffering major withdrawal symptoms from the pair that are "Jelly". Also, leave a wee review, I'd love to hear what everyone thinks!

Flickering her eyes open, her vision becomes momentarily blurred until she is able to focus. Smoothly, she runs her finger tips through the fine fabric of her duvet, pulling it ever so close to her almost as if to cocoon herself from whatever may have occurred last night. Finally taking the plunge, she turns in the bed to which she finds the one person lying there who she hates, but loves to be there – Tilly.

Dancing her fingers softly down Tilly's unclothed back, Jen takes a sharp intake of breath before hesitantly pulling away from the deluded state of bliss she'd let herself drift into. Perching herself against the backboard of the bed whilst holding her head in her hands, she mutters "what have you done?" before wrapping the side of the duvet around her naked body, her eyes quickly scanning the room in search for her belongings which have been carelessly but passionately tossed aside the night before. Once dressed, she turns once more, and looks upon the figure whom still lay unbeknown to the inner turmoil Jen was currently suffering. She smiled as she looked upon her quietly snoring, her nose twitching every so often, her red hair uncurling onto the pillow, one hand stretched along the bed almost as if she's looking for something.. or rather, someone. Taking the sight in before her, Jen couldn't help but feel devoured by her feelings, those little attributes of the red head which made Jen forget all circumstance, that is, for a fleeting moment anyway.

Casting her feelings aside, like she was so very used to, Jen grabbed her belongings and made a quick exit for the door, trying but evidently failing to dismiss the feeling of guilt she felt pang within her stomach, as a silent tear dropped down the side of her face. Clenching tightly onto her handbag, she sighed as she shut the door silently behind her. Pausing for a moment while readjusting her blazer, she began to daydream, if Foucault was right, perhaps the boundaries of society can be broken in order for the acceptance of new norms? Shaking her head violently, she quickly dismissed any inch of a thought of possibility, shaking out any thought she had of a relationship, any thought of love, and of course, she tried in vain, to shake the thought of a certain red-headed teenager, a particular teenager whom seemed to mercilessly occupy her thoughts day in and day out. A teenager who goes by the name, of Tilly Evans.


	2. Chapter 2

24 HOURS EARLIER

-

Walking down the stairs to the art base, Tilly felt her heart beat ferociously against her chest, almost like a warning bell for the almighty row which she anticipated would happen once meeting her teacher, and potential lover – Jen.

Tilly began to play out different scenarios in her head as she descended each step one by one, the way Jen had been acting was ambiguous, something she couldn't quite put her finger on. She could tell Jen harboured feelings for her however, the way she'd been acting proved she wanted rid of Tilly. She gasped before reaching the door, even the very thought of that sent an overwhelming feeling of dismay rippling through her body, like someone was tugging on her heart strings religiously. She knew herself she couldn't let that happen however, feeling vulnerable, she promised herself she wasn't going to put herself out there like she did before.

"I didn't think you'd come." Jen shot an almost desperate glance as she looked up from her coursework to the red head. Replying with a half-smile, Tilly perched herself on a table across from Jen, before opening a book laying in front of her and pretending to skim over the readings.

"George didn't fancy hanging out.." She replied, knowing fine well it was a lie, but perhaps a believable one at that.

After the ice had finally broke between the two, Jen plucked up the courage to move closer to Tilly, she felt she had to. _How can someone be so near but so far away at the same time? _Cursing herself for craving such contact with her, she perched herself next to Tilly on the table, looking over her shoulder as the pair began to chat.

"We can meet in town sometimes, check out some galleries… just as friends.." Jen reinforced, her mouth creeping into a half smile, her eyes scanning Tilly's features in adoration, waiting for a response.

Tilly smirked, it was all well saying "just as friends" but she knew herself that it was only a matter of time before that boundary was broken again, the fact Jen even brought her down to the art base in the first place proving she cared a little more for her than she was letting on.

"Of course, as friends… what do you think I meant?" she replied, her eyes seductively magnetising towards Jen's bottom lip sending her heart into overdrive.

Jen pondered for a minute, before furrowing her brow, she didn't need to say anything, she knew fine well that Tilly knew exactly what she meant. Thankfully before she could even begin to stammer a valid reason Tilly cut in. "Jeez." She smiled, rolling her eyes flirtatiously.

"One track mind or what?"

Jen couldn't help but let out a nervous laugh, she found it insane that even though every instinct told her to stay away from Tilly, the witty teenager always seemed to draw her back in.

"Very funny, Miss Evans." She smiled sarcastically, rolling her eyes to the ceiling. "I'm only stating the mere obvious" Tilly stated defiantly, finding pleasure in the fact she had left Jen currently speechless. Jen gasped, it never did fail to intrigue her how Tilly was able to read her every thought, even anticipate her next move before she even made it. Words evidently failing her, She batted Tilly's arm playfully before Tilly retaliated by grabbing her wrist, the action pulling the pair closer, their faces now within touching distance. Pondering for a moment, Jen allowed herself to take in Tilly, loosing herself in the girl's blue eyes, she found her vision drifting slowly down to her perfectly pouted pink lips she could almost smell the intoxicating scent of a sweet strawberry lip balm, something which made her lust for her even more. Edging ever so closer, Jen's lips parted slightly until eventually her conscience abruptly snapped her back into reality. "This is going well.." She managed to joke, breaking away any eye contact she shared with the red head while her eyes scanned any inch of the room possible that wasn't in Tilly's direction.

Sighing from the break of contact, Tilly began to feel her heart rate slow down, as the moment disappeared as did any hope of getting through to Jen.

"Listen, my parents are away for the weekend.. I'm not doing much, it'd be nice if you came round.." Tilly offered, trying to regain Jen's attention.

"Tilly.. we.."

"Can't go there, I know.." The red head reinforced, pulling further apart from Jen on the table she began to fidget with her fingers, almost in a frustration.

"I'm sorry, I want to however.."

"Forget it. It was a silly idea." Tilly replied, shocking Jen slightly. "Well, if you let me finish!" Jen retaliated, her brow furrowing slightly almost in anger, something Tilly found undoubtedly cute about her. Jen stuttered for a moment, almost as if words had escaped her. She knew in her mind what she wanted to say, of course she'd love nothing more than to tell Tilly she'd love to spend time with her, how the teenager only had to simply glance at her to make her heart melt, how day in and out in this dump of a school all she can ever think about is her, speaking with her, laughing with her, being..with her. Jen was by no means proud, she always lived by her own rules. Convention was perceived as a boundary to be broken, and up until now, defiance may as well have been her middle name. She enjoyed delving into something risky, it's something she finds alluring in life, however, this time was different, this time, her career was on the line. Even one more kiss could lead to a dangerous situation, one in which she knew she wouldn't have the will power to stay away from. She had to have Tilly, she felt magnetised towards her, but for now, it was better to have a barrier between them both, no matter how much it physically pained her. She was afraid that once she started, she'd never be able to stop.

Fighting back the voices in her head, she even shocked herself by the words which flowed so carelessly from her mouth.

"I suppose if we're going to be friends, I could come round for a bit, that's what friends do.. right?" She paused, almost as if she was waiting for Tilly to validate her decision.

"Yeah of course, we can get a takeaway in or something, I promise I won't try something with you over a curry." Tilly joked, breaking the shattering tension surrounding the pair as a smile mutually embedding on their lips.

"You're on." Jen smiled, one side of her conscience constantly at war with her, niggling her, and reminding her that one slip, and this could end in disaster.


	3. Chapter 3

**Authors Note: **A very big thanks to everyone who has kindly left a review, you've been my inspiration to finally get on with this next chapter (apologies for the slight delay). Hopefully you'll enjoy it, I know we're all partially down due to a severe lack of Jelly and the pair ending on a very sad note (for the time being, here's hoping!) so read on, leave a review – I do love hearing your views and comments, and I will see about starting chapter 4 as soon as possible.

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing.

Tapping her knuckles against the door, Jen began to bite her lip nervously as she awaited an answer. She knew her even being at Tilly's, a student's home at this time of night was not responsible of her. Standing alone, Jen was able to collect her thoughts, she began to grow anxious. She didn't quite know if this was due to the forbidden situation she'd carelessly found herself in, or due to the masses of butterflies which swirled around in her stomach at the thought of seeing the teenager again. After what seemed an eternity the door promptly opened to which Jen was greeted by a dazzling smile, outlined perfectly by a devilish colour of red lipstick.

"Hey.." Tilly smiled, before gesturing for Jen to walk in. Looking the girl up and down, Jen took one last hesitant glance around her before entering Tilly's home.

"You're sure your parents aren't home?" Jen asked, suspiciously eyeing up the hallway while slipping her jacket off.

"About that, they came back early, they really want to meet you." Jen's face dropped with this admission as she quickly turned on her heel to face Tilly. Noticing a slight smirk take over the red heads face, Jen quietly exhaled, almost as if all her anxieties had diminished.

"Don't do that to me." She sighed, before scrunching up her nose and playfully slapping Tilly's arm, this action only but prompting a smug little smile from Tilly's part.

"I'm sorry, it was too good an opportunity." She replied, before brushing past Jen ever so slightly leading her to the kitchen area. As Jen followed she couldn't help but smile to herself. Tilly was wearing the very same beige dress with small studs accompanied by the most innocent white tights – the outfit she'd wore when she'd met her for the first time at the art gallery, a time which felt so long ago. Gasping slightly, her eyes trailed down the girl's body. She couldn't help but notice a paradox from her almost angelic navy headband to her figure hugging dress, which left very little to the imagination and yet, regained such an innocence about it. She felt her heart nervously thump against her chest as she entered the kitchen area to which she was greeted by an immaculate set up.

"Tilly… you.." Jen gasped, shocked but in a way secretly impressed with the hidden romantic inside the red head.

"It's nothing Jen, it's only a meal, in no way is it inclined with anything I just…wanted to cook for you." Tilly smiled, in her usual confident manner before pulling out a mahogany chair gesturing for the brunette to take a seat at the well laid out table, two place mats facing each other for the pair. Sighing, Jen couldn't help but smile as she looked over to the kitchen area, Tilly beginning to fluster as an array of pots steamed simultaneously.

"I think you may need a hand?" Jen professed, smiling through her words as the red head darted about the kitchen carrying a different utensil with each journey, evidently at a loss for patience.

"Nope, I'm fine!" Tilly replied whilst frantically tackling a pot, her brow furrowed as she began to notice the contents begin to bubble and congeal. Noticing this, a vacant expression overwhelmed her face, sticking her tongue out she zoned into full concentration whilst trying to scrape the remains off the sides, preventing the pot from being burned further. Whilst doing so she subtly reminded herself that this was the first time since meeting Jen that her thoughts weren't centred solely around her. For three whole weeks, Tilly found that each notion she had always had repercussions. If she wasn't thinking about Jen, she was thinking about how her actions would affect her. Jen had consumed her being, entirely. There was little to no doubt that the teenager had fallen completely besotted with her, craved her, and the fact that Jen would mercilessly change her mind and show no emotion when doing so, really cut her up. Emotion, this was something Tilly pondered over with regards to Jen. The brunette did undoubtedly have a very expressive face, whatever she was feeling was instantly portrayed. However, this unfortunately didn't mirror in her actions. It was almost as if Jen was in an emotional tug of war with herself, one minute Tilly could almost feel Jen's eyes tracing every inch of her body, not only their physical attraction but how they connected intellectually on so many levels. To the next where Jen would cast Tilly aside and begin a righteous tirade of how "wrong" it was of them to continue "whatever it was they were doing" as she is her teacher – which Tilly more than found understandable. Even though she'd only known Jen for a short period of time, Tilly already felt like she'd gone through a lifetime of heartbreak. This is what she found most challenging about the brunette, however, she always did appreciate a challenge.

"Tilly!" a voice abruptly called, interrupting subconscious state. The sudden fright Tilly received from the touch of a hand on her bag had in turn made the red head drop a scalding metal spoon onto her free hand, causing her to cry out in pain.

Quickly reaching out for her hand, Jen managed to usher Tilly over to the sink before switching the ice cold tap on and gently placing her hand under the flow of water. Noticing a small tear escape and make its way down Tilly's pronounced cheek bones, Jen used her free hand to wipe it away, the touch instantly having a calming effect.

"Remind me to never let you near a kitchen again." Jen smiled, causing Tilly to let out a small laugh before they both erupted into laughter at the sheer carnage which just unfolded over preparing a simple spaghetti bolognaise dish. Cupping Tilly's hand gently in her own under the running water, Jen began to lightly caress her skin. She traced her fingers along her palms with such good care before she noticed Tilly up turn her head, her green eyes connecting with her own whilst the pair stood closely. "I..um…I think it's all right now" Tilly spoke softly, her vision magnetised to the slightly taller brunettes. Without as much as a flicker of emotion Jen leant in carefully, the pair gradually began to come closer as the tension between them reached boiling point. When suddenly a pot began to overflow calling out for attention on the hob, abruptly snapping the pair back into reality.

Quickly breaking away Jen attended to the pot of pasta, taking it off the heat and turning the dial down carefully, her breathing becoming erratic, however, she wasn't quite sure whether it was down to how quickly she bolted to the hob, or the intense moment she just dangerously shared with the teenager.

"I think its best that I take over here, we don't want that happening again." Jen tried to joke, before cursing herself at the unintentional double meaning her statement had provided. An air of silence infused between the pair, before Tilly decided it was time to be a little more abrupt. It was time she stopped Jen playing with her feelings, playing with their situation, and more importantly, it was time for Jen to admit what she really wanted from the teenager. Stepping forward she gently turned the hob off, an action which didn't go unmissed by the brunette. Placing her hands on her hips she gently turned Jen around to come face to face with her. Stepping forward she noted how Jen's hands instantly crossed over her abdominal area – almost like a barrier of insecurity, something which the teacher had indeed informed Tilly of when they were outside the hospital that day. Dismissing this, she carried on anyway, defiantly forcing Jen to stare back at her.

"But it's always going to happen again… isn't it Jen?".


	4. Chapter 4

Searching her face, the brunette began to feel an onset of panic bubble within her, this is what she feared most from this evening, and it was happening already, not even an hour into meeting with the teenager.

"Tilly, don't spoil this.." She spoke, sighing slightly whilst trying to calm her nerves.

"Spoil this? So you're eventually admitting we have something to spoil?" Tilly retaliated, raising an eyebrow questionably at the brunette. Jen took in her reaction, as much as she felt like she wanted to crumble on the spot, she couldn't help but admire how cute the red head looked, so defiant yet so passionate about what she wanted. That's what she liked about her the most, her passion. She displayed it in everything she done, and most importantly, she wasn't afraid to display it towards Jen, something she found new and refreshing.

"Tilly, it's not like that, you know where we stand, we can be friends. Even at that I'm jeopardising my career, you and me… it's a non-starter." Jen muttered, instantly reminding herself that she'd spoken those last words not too long ago to which prompted a bad reaction. She dropped her vision to the floor, she couldn't bring herself to look at Tilly. The guilt, the pain, and more importantly, the fact she was lying through her teeth with every word that tumbled out of her mouth.

"Change the record Jen." Tilly finally stated, an element of dismay present within her voice before turning on her heel and simply walking off out of the kitchen and away from Jen. The brunette stood there, totally astounded. She began to feel a slight feeling of anger bubble inside her stomach. _How dare she walk away from me? _She thought briefly, furrowing her brow further before following her into the living room. Preparing herself for an almighty row she began to slowly assimilate back into the reality of the situation. With her morale grounding her, she blinked back any tears and remembered she was responsible for this situation, and it was time she done the right thing and acted like an adult. Picking up her denim jacket from the arm of the sofa she noticed Tilly stood perfectly still looking out the window, Jen's presence being obvious to her, but she was refusing to acknowledge her – something which angered Jen more. She wanted her attention, she always did.

"It's best if I go." Jen stated with her tail in between her legs, searching desperately for a reaction from the red head which never did prevail.

"Yeah, it's best you do." Tilly stated, stinging Jen with her words. Although she was most definitely looking like the more confident one in the situation, she was choking back a lump in her throat, silent tears began to collect on her cheek before dropping down her face. Tilting her head up she began to blink free of her tears, trying her hardest to look as composed as possible. Inside she felt her heartbreak, but she knew herself that all this situation would ever do, is cause her exactly that, she couldn't deal with wanting someone she could never have so much anymore. Interrupting her thoughts she began to feel a presence behind her.

"Do you really want me to go?" She heard the voice enquire. Blinking back her tears she decided she'd had more than enough. Enough of the mind games, the feeling of having her heart repeatedly being broken and enough of this situation – it was impossible, and it was time they realised they couldn't be together – not properly. A couple of minutes ago she was so sure she could just allow Jen to walk out of her house and out of her life, but now, with this simple question it was almost as if all feeling for the brunette had returned, she had become like putty in her hands – a power which Tilly truly detested that Jen had over her. Turning around promptly Tilly began to vent over how Jen can't change her mind so often, how she can't want her one minute and drop her the next, how she can't look at her the way she does without expecting a reaction and how she can't damn well expect Tilly to stand by and let her take a hold of every sense she felt she had within her body.

Daring not to interrupt Tilly's tirade, Jen's mind began to go into overdrive. _You have so much to lose, you've worked so hard to get here, leave now. _One part of her mind began to constantly remind her, at war with the other. _You simply can't, no matter how beautiful… no matter how intelligent.. no matter, how tempting._

"Look, even now you're not even paying attention to me, you just seem to black out, you'll never know what you want Jen, just leave." Tilly stated in anger, her emotions becoming the better of her as tears began to collect in her perfect green eyes. She tried to move away, tried to escape from Jen as quickly as possible before she broke down completely when she suddenly felt a tug on her left arm, abruptly spinning her around to come within inches of the brunette's face.

"I'm not leaving." Jen simply confessed.

She pulled Tilly into a passionate embrace. The pair's lips locked perfectly, their kiss alleviating all the pain they were both feeling as it began to get heated. Jen cupped Tilly's face with her hand, she used the other to skilfully manoeuvre the pair over to a nearby wall, slamming Tilly against it before kissing her passionately, their bodies pressed up against one another in a state of need. Switching up the roles, Tilly moved Jen so her back was now arched against the wall, before pressing tightly against her torso. She had dreamt of this moment for so long, and now it was finally happening. In between kisses she heard Jen simply make a confession.

"I can't stay away from you." She breathlessly stated, this only but fuelling her lust more. She needed Jen, and now she knew Jen needed her too. Feeling Jen's hand push against her chest lightly she broke away. She stared back into her eyes, their lips still close, but not locked in such passion as they were only moments ago.

"What's wrong?" Tilly enquired. Scared of what the reaction may be. Scared that how far they've both gotten was all for nothing, and with one simple sentence, Jen could walk out her life once again, leaving a trail of destruction in her wake.


	5. Chapter 5

**Authors Note: **Thank you very much for the feedback everyone, it really does give me a drive to get my ass in gear and write new chapters! Due to a lack of the lovely Jelly on our screens, I found this pretty challenging to continue. I'm thinking of maybe beginning a new one shot after this chapter, let me know what you think.

All reviews are welcome, I'm very humbled to even see my fic circulating Twitter and Tumblr. So again, thanks for the encouragement.

"Nothing's wrong it's just I.." Jen began to stammer, her breathing erratic from the sudden passionate outburst she'd just shared with the student. _Her _student. As she peered up at Tilly, she continuously fought every instinct in her being. All she could see before her was such beauty, such promise, something which made her forget all circumstance. Tilly's brow began to furrow, a slight hint of worry and confusion edged across her face as she began to back away subconsciously.

"It's just what Jen?" She enquired, fearing the worst.

"I just.. I shouldn't be here."

Jen slipped herself out of the moment, holding her head in her hands as she began to pace around the living room, her inner turmoil evidently consuming her. Tilly watched on paralysed in the same position, her arm propping her up against the wall where the pair stood before shaking her head. A silent tear made its way down her cheek. She felt hopeless, almost as if every step she managed to get Jen to take forward, another two were taken back. Wiping away a single tear she composed herself before brushing down her dress, straightening it up, and brushing away any evidence Jen left behind.

"You're right Jen, you know you shouldn't be here.. That doesn't stop you from coming back." Tilly sighed.

With this admission Jen brought her head back up, catching an intense eye contact with the red head. She knew she was right, _she always was. _The teenager had the ability to read her like an open book, something which she had absolutely no control over. Around her, Jen knew she wouldn't be able to keep away, all self-control evaded her. She felt magnetised towards her even in a room full of people, she always did, and that was what frightened her the most.

"How can this work? It goes against everything I believe in, everything I've worked for.. " She retorted pacing around the room, an anger building up within her as she couldn't even muster up the strength to come to terms with how she truly felt – or at least articulate how she felt towards her. Tilly looked un-phased, she'd lost count of how many times she'd found herself on the receiving end of one of Jen's morally enhanced speeches. Shaking her head she decided to take the plunge once again, however much of a fool she felt for doing so. Taking Jen's hands she began to cup them in her own before bowing her head down, using her index finger to tilt Jen's head up to look intently at her, almost as if she'd found the power to see through her, and ultimately, to break through the continual barrier Jen kept arising between them. Tilly looked at the woman before her, her eyes glistening with unshed tears, something which made her stomach dip. She had grown to care so much for the brunette, and seeing her like this made her heart drop, but as selfish as it was, she found it impossible to stop. Moving closer to the brunette her eyes became drawn to her lips, her hands gradually wandering to her hips, pulling her ever so closer. Pursing her own lips with the faintest smile on her face, the tension began to build up between the pair once again. She knew fully what they both wanted, regardless of the circumstance. Feeling a surge of confidence she began to lean over, placing small kisses on the right side of Jen's neck. She could taste a slight hint of her perfume on her lips before returning to face her. Jen found herself helpless, moaning at even the slightest touches the red head provided her with.

_This is wrong, so wrong. _She continually thought, as a look of desperation filled her eyes. Eventually tired of giving up a protest her expression loosened, she picked up one of Tilly's hands and brought it towards her lips before placing a smile, but subtle kiss onto her skin. Tilly smiled almost sympathetically at the gesture as her eyes met Jen's causing her heart to haplessly skip a beat, before lowering her voice into a hushed tone.

"Jen you know how I feel about you, and you know I want this… I think you do too."


	6. Chapter 6

"Tilly.." Jen responded, in a triumph to keep the space between the pair still visible. Tilly shook her head, almost defiantly. She'd waited long enough to get this far with Jen, and she was certain she couldn't let this moment slip.. It may be the only one she'll ever get after all.

"Tell me you don't want this Jen, tell me and I'll leave you alone." She spoke, almost in a whisper as she gazed adoringly into Jen's deep brown eyes. She awaited an answer, her lips only but inches away from the brunette's. She noted Jen's lips parting slightly as she exhaled a shaky breath, taking that as her reply she smiled to herself.

"That's what I thought." She smiled cheekily. Tired of her constant inner struggle Jen decided it was time she gave herself a break. Time she broke out of the convention she had subconsciously assimilated into and time to give in to what she really wanted – the red head standing before her. Unable to control herself any longer she moved forward, grabbing Tilly by the hips she pulled her close before planting the most meaningful kiss onto her lips. Biting the red heads bottom lip ever so slightly she smiled sweetly, her eyes flickering from her eyes to her bottom lip before ushering the pair over to a nearby couch. Laying down the red head with such care she found herself giving in to every little thing she felt was wrong. For that moment, it was as if all her cares had floated away. Her lips melted into Tilly's with such passion as she cupped her face in her hands whilst positioning herself on top of her. Moving from her mouth to her neck, Jen began to leave a trail of small kisses along her jawline, Tilly in turn throwing her head back as her fingers intertwined with Jen's free hand – a small gesture, but somewhat a symbol of trust which they knew they both mutually shared. Bringing her head back down Tilly managed to compose herself by placing her hands at either side of Jen's face, staring intently into her eyes, their breathing becoming erratic. Leaning in once more the pair began to passionately kiss, their tongues eagerly searching one another's mouth, the kiss becoming more and more passionate.

"I can't deal with being apart from you anymore." Jen shook her head, closing her eyes tightly pulling Tilly back into her. Smiling, Tilly began to strip off each particle of clothing one by one until she was left in her underwear. Smiling seductively, Tilly pushed Jen back up right into a sitting position as she looked down at the red head, taking in the beauty that was before her. Trailing her fingers down her stomach, she halted at the girls waistband, teasing her as her fingers trailed up the inside of her thighs. Tilly began to arch her back, almost as if gesturing for more, a series of moans escaping her mouth.

"Tilly, are you sure?" Jen asked thoughtfully, her eyebrow raised as she held the red head in her arms. Tilly smiled beneath her before reaching up and casting away a small brunette strand of hair which stood out on Jen's face before repositioning it back into her perfectly aligned fringe. The feel of her fingers brushing against her skin automatically making Jen close her eyes before Tilly leaned closer, looking directly at the brunette.

"I've never been more sure". She smiled, before pulling Jen into a passionate embrace. Jen began to leave a trail along Tilly's perfectly toned body, starting from her chest right down to the bottom of her stomach. Planting small kisses along every inch of her body, Tilly began to moan quietly whilst reaching out for Jen's hand, intertwining her fingers with her own. As much as she felt impulsed to be with Tilly, Jen was lost in a moment, she wanted to appreciate every inch of Tilly's body, plant a trail of kisses within every centimetre. In a way it reminded her of a blank canvas, something which she felt but compelled to leave her mark on, and after what seemed like hours upon hours of romance.. She most _certainly_did just that.

_No, you're not in love. Not by any stretch of the imagination. Yes she's intelligent and yes, she may be beautiful, yes she may even be the perfect match for you on a whole lot of levels. But to love someone, one must think about that person day in and day out. One must simply picture them and smile unconsciously. One must appreciate every detail about the other, and appreciate the flaws which that person may possess. Maybe, just maybe.. You could be in love. But there's always a new day which comes after the night before, a new day which will bring back reality._

A new day, Jen thought, that she'll find herself running from once again.


	7. Chapter 7

**Authors Note: **In order to set the scene more for this chapter you might like to re-read chapter 1 before reading this section (it all ties in, trust me ;) ). Anyway, I hope I've done them justice, it's pretty hard seeing as they've been off our screens for so long! Don't forget to leave a wee review, I love reading them. :)

**…...**

Perching herself on a seat in the art base she began to run her fingers across multiple paintings which lay before her on the desk. Squinting her vision, she averted her eyes to her watch – 4:30am. Sighing slightly, her attention became drawn to the window. The sun was beginning to peek over the tops of faraway mountains, its glare unforgivably beating down and streaming into the base, injecting it with such colour and prominence. Smiling at the sight before her, she rose to her feet before walking over to the window, softly opening the blinds before admiring the scene before her. She appreciated small moments like this in life. She found herself surveying the college grounds, such imperfections and yet, something as simple as a sun rise could inject such life, such promise to even the dullest of surroundings. Turning on her heel, she felt a sense of satisfaction wash over her before she took her place back down at her desk, every inch of it snowed under by last minute marking – something which was pretty unusual for Jen.

Sighing she picked up the first piece daintily, her fingers pricking the sides in order to keep its presentation. Marvelling at the piece she found herself becoming very impressed with its visual aspects. It was a portrait of a woman's figure. Running her fingers along it she admired the extension of effort which had obviously gone into the painting, everything from the impartial parts of shading to the expression in which the woman had- it was almost professional. She scanned over the figure's expression, depicting that the character had a sense of ambiguity beyond the black hair which enclosed its face. The figure looking almost _too_familiar. She took out the student's cover sheet before turning it towards her. Feeling her heart sink in a split second, she revealed the name – Tilly Evans. Automatically throwing the cover sheet to one side she dropped her head in her hands. The same Tilly Evans who's bed she'd left only hours ago, the same Tilly Evans whom she'd made love to all of last night, and the same Tilly Evans whom she'd abandoned, ran away from, and had to confront in class later on that day.

"What have you done?" She muttered to herself, although it hadn't been the first time. She'd found herself asking that same question whatever her actions may be with regards to the teenager. Much like the painting her actions had been ambiguous. She'd picked Tilly up and pushed her away more times than she could care to remember. Vivid flashbacks began to fulfil her mind. _Her touch_grazing her skin, the way she felt beneath her, her warm, soft skin caressing against her own. The feeling of the red heads soft plump lips placing against her own, planting small but subtle kisses along every inch of her mouth and neck. The way she only had to look at her and Jen felt her whole being melt, becoming a victim to her own feelings. There was no doubt Tilly had consumed her, entirely. She was head over heels in love no matter what she tried to tell herself, and last night only but intensified that.

_But your career_, she began to remind herself, crashing straight back into reality. Her career meant the world to her, she'd worked ever so hard to get where she was now, put in so many hours of work, supported herself when no one else was there to do it for her. Was she really ready to throw that all away? Jeopardise that? All for this one girl..

Was it really worth it?

**…...**

Her heart rate began to quicken as the clocks hand drew nearer the time. It was almost 12 o'clock, and Jen hadn't received a single text message from the red head. Not one. After abruptly leaving her in the early hours this morning it wasn't exactly like she felt she was owed something as simple as a text, but she felt she needed it. She needed it for clarification, she needed to know what was going through her mind. As her next class began to spill into the classroom Jen greeted the pupils with a small, half-hearted smile, her eyes quickly scanning the crowd in search for her. Glancing over to where the teenager usually sat she became dismayed at the empty seat.

"I wonder where Tilly's got to…" George began to ponder as Maddie flicked through her mobile phone from under the table. "I'm just texting her at the moment, it's definitely not like Mrs book worm to miss a class" She replied, before keying in a text and sending it off. Hearing this, Jen turned around before setting up an art table for the class, she had so much to get through with them as exams drew nearer and yet, all her attention had been consumed by the teenager lately. She found it almost impossible to concentrate.

"Ahh.. Tilly! We almost sent a search party out for you babe.." Maddie smiled, before pulling out a seat and gesturing for Tilly to sit down. Shifting nervously into her seat Jen turned round abruptly, her vision catching the red heads as she sat at the table, her friends engrossed in their own conversation. Tilly stared blankly back at Jen, her brow furrowed almost as if she was awaiting an answer. An answer as to why after them getting so far last night, had Jen only but backtracked and returned to her old ways. Jen could feel her stomach dip as she stared back at the red head, the tension evidently getting to her as she felt all words escape her, this time there was no excuse. This time she knew herself she'd pushed Tilly too far. "I'm…sorry." She managed to mouth, before quickly darting her eyes anywhere but in Tilly's direction before commencing the class.

Slumping back in her chair Tilly felt defeated. She felt embarrassed, humiliated by Jen. The way she'd left her bed so carelessly, without as much as an explanation. It was almost as if everything they'd spoken about the night before had diminished. All hope, all promise which the pair had shared only hours before was gone, and all this situation had ever seemed to cause her was constant torment. Unpacking her belongings onto the table before her she sighed before reaching a conclusion. It was time she stopped running after Jen.. Stopped fantasizing of what can never be.

Maybe it was time to just let go.


	8. Chapter 8

**Authors note: **Thank you very much everyone for your comments and of course patience! This chapter does involve a smidge of heartbreak however I have big plans for the next couple of chapters. Keep the faith for Jelly.

The rest of the class seemed to just drift on by. Tilly, whom felt herself warped in a bubble of rage over Jen, couldn't help but feel compelled to everything the brunette seemed to say. Everything, from her passion over the most simplistic things to analysing each creation and breaking it down to a simpler form in order to pass her knowledge on to the students. _She was so intelligent.. _Tilly began to day dream, a small smile creeping upon her face as her eyes scanned across the brunette's body, her eyes motioning and hugging across her curves, lingering for just a moment too long.. becoming reminiscent of each hidden curve within her figure, those curves that she was able to witness and lay hands upon the previous night.

"Tilly?" Maddie snapped, rudely awakening Tilly from her dream-like state. "Babe.. seriously, if you _still _have a crush on her_, _hold back on the undressing eyes eh?" She giggled, prompting a wide-eyed reaction from the red head.

"I.. but.. I don't have a crush on her, I don't! I told you, that ended." She began to protest, as Maddie applied a vibrant lip-gloss onto her lips, ignorantly directing all her attention into the compact mirror she held grasped in front of her. Turning and smiling one of her infamous knowing smiles, Maddie gave Tilly a subtle wink.

"Well that's ok then.. the last thing we want is you getting hurt Tils. She isn't right for you." She confidently vouched, running her index finger along the outline of her lips before pouting back to her own reflection. Tilly couldn't help but smirk at the way in which her friend could depict situations. However self-absorbed Madeline Morrison may be, she was observant at that, her statement had both provided a warning and a realisation to Tilly.

…

"As I was saying.. Tilly.. TILLY!" George almost shouted as he began to wave a hand in front of Tilly's face in a bid for her attention.

"What? yeah, sorry George." Tilly began to stammer as her cheeks rushed with colour. George furrowed his brow, shifting his vision from Maddie and back to Tilly before patting her on the hand.

"The bell? It just rang.. are you ok?" George asked concerned, completely unaware of his friends real inner turmoil.

"Tilly?" a familiar voice came behind the red head causing her to turn on her heel.

"Would you stay behind? It's about your assignment, just a few things I'd like to run over." Jen smiled briefly, her head tilted to one side before her expression changed, realising the red heads puffy eyes and vacant expression. Without saying a word she nodded subtly before waving both George and Maddie off promising to catch up with them later. As Maddie sauntered off she looked round, casting a glance at Tilly, a knowing glance before departing. _Am I really that obvious?_ She frowned, cursing herself from being unable to hide her emotions. "How can she tell?" she whispered to herself, before dropping her head into her hands.

"Because anyone who is really watching us, can." Jen spoke softly, as she perched next to Tilly on the table. Looking around and casting one last glance to the shut classroom door, Jen reached out her hand before capturing Tilly's with it.

"That's why, we have to stop this." Jen professed, hating herself for every word that carelessly began to tumble out of her mouth. She didn't mean a word of it. She wanted nothing more than to be with Tilly, to label her as her girlfriend, to forget about all circumstance but her head wouldn't let her. As much as she let her heart beat for Tilly, her conscience always seemed to inevitably win the tug of war between love and circumstance. She began yet another tirade of how much she loved her profession, how dangerous their involvement could be when she stopped suddenly. Taking in the sight before her she noticed Tilly's eyes were glued to the floor the whole way through. The normally outspoken teen was almost lifeless, hidden in her own shell preventing herself from objecting to Jen's wishes, something which dismayed Jen even more so. "Tilly?" she spoke, before reaching out a hand and cupping the red heads face. Displaying emotion for the first time in 10 minutes Tilly snatched her hand away.

"Do you know how humiliating that was for me? To wake up in bed and find you weren't there.. to realise all we shared last night was gone?" She snapped before moving off the table and walking towards the door. Turning back she looked at Jen, her brown eyes filling with desperation. Their eye contact was locked before Jen dropped her vision down to her hands, which lay imbedded in her lap, fidgeting continuously. "I panicked, I'm sorry." Was all Jen could muster, her words being thrown like daggers through Tilly's heart. Fighting back the tears which were gathering in her eyes Tilly took all her strength to channel her thoughts into speech.

"I'm done Jen. I can't do this." She simply stated, her vision becoming blurred much like the boundaries they'd overstepped before reaching for the door, trying to escape the situation and ultimately, trying to escape her own paralysing feelings of hurt. Just as she tried to leave she felt her arm being pulled back, as the door slammed shut once again, capturing both women within the classroom. Jen pulled her body closer as her hand ran reassuringly down Tilly's arm, trying to calm the girl. Her eyes became glued to her face, each tear droplet made her heart ache and with her thumb she began to dismiss them from the red heads face. Lowering her head she rested her forehead against Tilly's before giving out a sigh. Unable to fight back her own emotions, the usually composed teacher began to cry, her tears silently escaping her eyes and onto Tilly's dress.

"Can't you see what this is doing to me Tilly? This is my whole career, it means more to me than anything.. but you, you've came along and I cant." She began to clumsily state, her feelings getting the better of her. "Last night meant so much to me, being able to feel you after imagining it for so long. I've fallen for you.. I know I have, but I can't be with you. Don't you see? We're never going to work out. No matter how much we want it to." She finally finished as Tilly distanced herself stunned at Jen's confession. Out of her friends Tilly had always been the responsible one. The most level headed girl and her maturity had reached far beyond her years, or so she perceived. She hated to see Jen in such a vulnerable state, she wished nothing more than to pacify her in her arms, let her know everything was going to be alright but even she knew it was impossible. And it broke her heart.

"I'm not afraid of what others may think but if it's what you want, we can keep this a secret for as long as we need, I'll wait however long it takes, I need to be with you.." Tilly began to plead, her state being a far cry from the previous emotionless state she had took on only moments ago. She held Jen in her arms, wiping away her tears as she began to plant small kisses onto her forehead and nose. Jen pulled back suddenly, creating a distance between them both before composing herself. "Don't.." she quietly whispered, almost ashamed that she'd let herself get so close to the red head after her previous defiance. Looking stunned Tilly felt herself at a loss for words. Grabbing her bag from the table she hooked it over her shoulder before walking over to the teacher, coming within inches of her face before stating what she felt.

"You can't do this to me any longer, pick me up and then drop me. If you really have fallen for me, you've allowed yourself to, because it's what _you _want. That is what _you're _failing to see." She spoke through a stream of tears, using the corner of her cardigan she began to fix any stray mascara which had stained her face before turning to the door. Jen couldn't help but watch on as she opened the door once again, her heart was physically paining her against her chest but she felt glued to the spot, all ability had evaded her. She felt shattered, in pieces, and she only had herself to blame.

"You've broken your own rules."


	9. Chapter 9

...

The alley was dark, it enclosed her, captured her in a tainted evil that only but supressed her mood even more so. A fog had fallen, a mist began to spread in the air, consuming whatever it touched in its path. She walked towards the mist, letting it consume her, letting it shield her, conceal her from the world. Much like the fallen mist, Jen began to feel her emotions spread and take over her physical being, supressing her like a sheet of utter despair. Her knees began to tremble beneath her, her nerves were on end, pinching away what was left of her strength. Finding a nearby bench she stumbled towards it, gripping its handles before her legs gave way, allowing her to fall into a pitiful mess on the cruel mahogany wood. Bringing her knees to her chest she began to quietly sob, hiding her face in the space between her knees and chest, breathing in the cloudy but malicious air. She looked up once more, her eyes searching, darting in desperation but found she was only met by silence. She began to subconsciously imagine a figure in the distance, a figure making its way towards the brunette, casting anything in its path aside as it battled towards her. Feeling a sudden surge Jen rose to her feet, her insides crying out with a sudden happiness as she ran towards whom she wished the figure to be, her fingers outstretched in a bid to capture it, preventing her from getting away again. Once finally arriving at the mysterious figure Jen's face dropped, she was met by nothing. A blankness polluting the air. Perhaps it was a figment of her imagination she began to ponder, or perhaps it was wishful thinking. Wishful thinking that Tilly had come running back once again to her, and with that one action, took all her pain and suffering away. Grappling at the air for a few seconds longer, she sighed as she felt all hope slip away from her. Perching herself on the bench again she reassumed her crouched position, feeling as lonely and vulnerable as a lost child who'd lost its mother in an immensely large play park she began to sniffle once again, her tears escaping her eyes in quick succession.

"You love her.." she simply stated, shocking herself by her own admission. As her realisation kicked in she began to repeat the statement another few times almost for validation, taking short, quick breaths in between each word.

"You..love..her." She spoke, almost as if she didn't quite believe it herself. Gasping she brought her hand up to her face, placing her fingers against her forehead before crashing into the palm of her hand in despair. _How could you have been so careless Jen? _She began to think, images of the red head swirling in her head. _How did you get here? _She wondered, although the question was really double ended. For one, Jen thought she had everything clued up in her life. She was a free spirit however she always knew what she wanted from life. She prided herself on the career she'd made for herself, she prided herself on the fact she was able to financially support herself through 3 gruelling years of University and she prided herself on achieving where she wanted to be in life. But now that she was well and truly on the doorstep of employment, why did it feel so empty? Why when she envisioned her life, did she still feel like she was searching for more, when all that she'd ever wanted professionally, she managed to find?

"Tilly.." she whispered to herself, she'd found her answer. Without Tilly, all of this felt minimal. She'd stumbled upon this fun-loving, beautiful teenager and unknowingly, gave her her heart. Her stomach began to tie in knots, a sickly feeling arising within her, as she began to remember the cruel words she used to push Tilly away, the way in which she managed to drive a wedge between the pair – and it was all down to her. Rain began to beat down onto the unforgiving gravel before her. "Typical" she managed to force a half smile, before grabbing her handbag and making her way back home. In a way thankful that the heavens had opened, this way her tears wouldn't show as the rain began to pour over her, the water would only but intermingle with the tear stains on her face.

Arriving at her home Jen hesitantly outstretched her hand to turn the door knob when she began to hear muffled shouts coming from inside. Pressing against the door lightly she listened in, not wanting to intrude on anything serious. Shrugging slightly she decided to take the plunge. Opening the door to which Jen could only describe, as a civil warzone.

"Sinead, I don't think so! Drop it lady." Diane began to shout at her young teenage daughter, her emotion in turn causing her face to go a shade of crimson red with anger.

Up turning her nose Sinead rolled her eyes, huffing like a small child before retaliating back. "Aw mum, I'm seventeen, you can't tell me what to do! Bart will look.."

"Bart will do nothing! You could have died last year! And where was precious Bart?" Diane spat, it wasn't uncommon knowledge that she had such a distaste for her daughter's boyfriend. Suddenly silenced Sinead's bottom lip began to tremble, her mind looking for comebacks to which she couldn't find.

"What I've said is final. You are NOT going to Abersoch without supervision, alright? Now quit moping about and get upstairs, you have an exam in the morning." Her mother asserted. Jen found herself helpless, gasping at witnessing the pair's first fight before Sinead barged past, knocking Jen slightly in her travels as she began to weep as she made her way into her room. Slamming her door shut violently.

"I'm sorry about that love.. teenagers eh?" Diane laughed half-heartedly, as she made her way past Jen en route to the staircase. "Anyway, I'm off to bed, remember and unplug everything you use before coming upstairs. I'm forever telling Sinead.."

"Of course Di – get some rest." Jen smiled back, cutting off Diane's tirade. She sighed as Diane eventually left, sometimes feeling that Diane took on the mothering role a bit too often with her, she rolled her eyes. At least in her eyes Jen was still but a teenager inside. Switching on the kettle she set out two mugs for tea before placing the tea bag inside them and awaiting the kettle to boil. She began to drum her fingers in impatience, being left in a room alone proved challenging as she could only but embrace every thought she had tried to hide for so long, attacking her mind. Shaking them off she made her way upstairs, the warm mugs in hand before tapping on the second door from the landing with her foot.

"Unless you've came to apologise for being such a bitch mum, get lost!" The voice snapped from within the room. Jen smiled as she pushed through the door, breaking the barrier between them both.

"I'm afraid not, however I did make you a cuppa." She spoke as she placed down the warm mug on a place mat beside Sinead's bed. Smiling through a blanket of tears, Sinead took the cup between her fingers as she sipped upon the hot liquid. "Thanks." She replied as Jen nodded before making her way to the door, almost reaching it when she heard a sudden rush of excitement project from the teenager.

"Wait! Jen! I've just realised something!" Sinead proudly professed causing Jen to turn around.

"Yeah?" She asked intrigued however a little worried as to what the teenager may have "realised". After all, she had been acting more than odd the past couple of weeks, more so whenever a certain Tilly Evans was mentioned.

"Y'know it would be a _massive _favour for me Jen, at least consider it, take a seat.." Sinead began, her expression hopeful. Jen moved as instructed onto a chair beside her bed, slowly beginning to realise herself, just what the teenager may be asking of her.

"Well, you heard how my mum was banging on about how I need supervised in Abersoch, _like I'm some sort of kid!" _She mimicked before continuing.

"Well.. it's got me thinking. I can't have my mum there, no chance! So, why don't you come?" Sinead asked, in fact almost pleaded as she beckoned over to Jen, whom sat speechless.

"Sinead.. I um.. you know I would but, I cant.. isn't it a bit inappropriate? I'd rather go on holiday with my mother than my teacher." Jen giggled, trying to salvage her way out of the situation, her heart beating ferociously against her chest.

"Don't be silly! Get out of your teaching mode. It would be perfect... please Jen? I mean, I know you're a teacher and that's still a bit embarrassing, _no offence_, but you _are _pretty young. You're only a couple of years older than us... It would be a massive favour. I even have me suitcase packed and everything." Sinead shrugged before gesturing over to a packed-to-the-brim leopard print suitcase standing triumphantly in the corner of her room.

"I've been looking forward to it for so long, all me and Bart have spoken about is going away... getting away from this place." Sinead continued. Jen sat aback, taking in each word. She couldn't help but agree that everyone did indeed need a break from Hollyoaks at some point, herself included. She looked upon the teenager, her vision had dropped to her fingers as she began to fidget with them, she could see the look of despair in her eyes. It was something that she remembered feeling herself when she was her age when her father had prevented her from going on a trip with her mates. She could remember so vividly how left out she felt, like everything that was worth happening, was happening somewhere else. How she had been overly protected, shielded from the world instead of enjoying the fresh air and free-spirited environment that she'd grown to love as an adult. Where all inhibitions diminished, perhaps this was a chance for her to just _be_ the 21 year old she really is, instead of tormenting herself with middle-aged type dramas and work. Somewhere she could just, be free. _Careless._

"So what do you say?" Sinead asked, her hands clasped and in front of her nose, eagerly awaiting Jen's answer.

Jen pondered for a moment, and the first notion which immediately popped into her head – was Tilly. How could she go on a trip knowing with her there knowing what's happened between them, what _is _between them. That unspoken love that she knew both of them felt, could only but be acted upon instinctively. She knew herself she couldn't put them both in such a dangerous situation, where temptation lurked and beckoned around every corner. Even moments alone with the teenager proved difficult, even being around her Jen had to shake off all primal feelings of wanting to tear her clothes off. She _wanted _to touch her. She _wanted _to kiss her. Hell, she _wanted _her. Tilly had become like an impulsion, an addiction, and Jen had become like a hopeless addict, craving for her next fix. Shaking her head Jen rid herself of her thoughts, and decided to go with what her instincts told her to. She knew she was besotted with the girl however, her career was her career.

"Sinead, I'd love to but-"

"Great! Aww thanks Jen, you don't know how much this means.. wait until I tell everyone, you're a legend." Sinead cut her off, chirping with excitement before grabbing her mobile phone and running to the lounge area before making a series of over animated phone calls. Jen sat aghast, still perching on the seat, her mind working into an overdrive as her mouth dropped open, illustrating her sense of shock. She searched but couldn't find a plausible way to get herself out of this one, even the open window in Sinead's room which was proving highly tempting at this moment, at least then she wouldn't have to come to terms with what she'd just been forced to agree to. _Oh, dear. _She thought repeatedly.

_What have you done?_


	10. Chapter 10

**Authors Note: **Please accept my apologies as to the late update, I've been having some difficulty with my laptop in the past few weeks. I'll update with two chapters as I'm sure I've kept you waiting long enough. Anyway, I hope I've done Jelly some justice, hopefully it won't be too long until Amy Downham graces our screens once again *swoons*.

I've wrote more chapters so if you'd like to see more, then leave a review letting me know.

…..

Throwing her body restlessly around the bed, she managed to grapple onto a fine part of the duvet, softly caressing and flowing her fingers through the material. Her expression was vacant, almost as if all emotion had ceased and ran for cover. She felt numb as her eyes followed her fingers, magnetised by their movement against the fine white linen before they abruptly stopped their fluent path. Turning her hand into a fist she violently grabbed the duvet, her knuckles turning white as anger began to curse through her veins. She could _still _smell her, there was a reminder, almost as if her scent was still embedded within her bed sheet. The smell of her hair swept effortlessly across her pillow, a reminder by which the red head was more than eager to forget. She hated her for what she had put her through. In such a short time, Jen Gilmore had put her through enough torment for a lifetime. She thought back to the last time she was with Jen, within her classroom. The way she couldn't even explain herself as to why she'd left Tilly alone in her bed after making love to her. She couldn't explain why she ran away, all she could show was her shame for her actions, and this crushed Tilly. So why exactly, whenever she clapped eyes on the woman, that most perfect, beautiful figure – did she feel her whole being melt? Her resistance would break down, and her body would devote entirely? She longed for her, and as she managed to get herself out of bed and begin the ceremonious task of getting ready for college she stared back at her reflection in the mirror. Running her fingers along tear stains she looked more intently to her eyes, heavy with a slight dark ring under the bottom demonstrating the teenager's lack of sleep. _"Don't.." _was all she kept replaying in her mind, like a song on loop. She remembered back to how she tried to console Jen, only for her to be pushed away, almost ashamed to be so near her. She began to question what she had become, and how she managed to let everything push her this far.

"You're better than this Tilly, you know you are." She stated, before sniffling any spare tears, and finding the strength to pull herself together for the day ahead.

…

"But mum.. I have some brilliant news y'know! You don't have to worry, not even an inch!" Sinead began to buzz around the kitchen like an adventurous insect, fixing herself some toast as her grin widened, the excitement almost bursting out of her.

"Jen has agreed to come to Abersoch!" She blurted before gesturing over to a very dishevelled Jen walking downstairs, rubbing her eyes ferociously and yawning. Making her way into the kitchen she eventually looked up to see both Sinead and Diane look at her. Sinead was looking unusually animated for it being 8am whereas Diane looked utterly confused.

"Sorry?" Jen enquired, praying that she had imagined what she had just heard.

"I was just telling me mum Jen, how you've agreed to come to Abersoch? I'm absolutely _buzzing, _I can't tell you how much! You're a star!" Sinead spoke as she began to excitedly tick off everything she had planned for her holiday.

_Abersoch. _Jen's eyes widened, she took a seat at the kitchen table before crashing her head into her hands. Her heart began to quicken as the realisation kicked in, her palms beginning to gain moisture. Running her fingers through her hair, she felt physically sick. Images of a certain red head began to cross her mind in quick succession, the situation almost devouring her every thought before she became interrupted by a voice beside her.

"And you are positive you're OK with this Jen? Don't let Madame here pressure you into anything." Diane spoke as she placed a mug of hot tea in front of the brunette, concerned at her deep, but expressionless face.

Jen looked up, connecting eye contact with Sinead as her happy mood began to take a momentary relapse as she awaited Jen's response. Sighing, she knew she didn't have it in her to let the teenager down so badly after she'd built herself up so high. She was pressured, but surely this was a sign from somewhere? She didn't know. At this moment she didn't know much. However, what she did know, is that this was going to be one _eventful _holiday, and she was already feeling the pressure of it.

"Of course Di- It's no problem at all." She lied before taking a sip upon her tea. The next step was finding a way to tell Tilly, and the thought of this filled her with an instant anxiety. Dismissing this she turned her attention to Sinead who was whistling away whilst packing pens and books into her bag.

"Anyway, you better get off for your exam, good luck, and remember and grab something to eat from the canteen before you go in." Jen smiled before getting up from the table and realigning her yellow cardigan, giving her hair one last dust over with her fingers and grabbing her handbag before Diane cut her off as she walked out to the door.

"Oi you, that's my line! You have a good day too hun. Try and ease off the stress ey? You're only young, worry when you're my age." Diane laughed as Jen spun round. Unintentionally Diane's statement had provided a very vital double meaning. Rolling her eyes, Jen smiled to herself before waving off Diane, commencing her way out the doorway before closing it over and descending down the steps. The sun began to rise upon the village, illuminating everything it touched in its path, pinpointing enhancements of vibrant colour to even the dullest of surroundings. Today seemed to be looking up, despite the minor fact that her heart was breaking with every step she took towards the college and of course a certain teenager she would be faced with there.


	11. Chapter 11

Trailing her fingers down her body, the brunette began to follow with her tongue, seductively looking up at Tilly as she lay upon the bed watching her every move. She was fascinated, captivated by her form and she made sure her finger tips pricked each and every inch of skin she could find. Stripping the teenager to her underwear, she began to press her unclothed body against hers, feeling her body jolt at the sudden touch, her breasts perked against her own. Smiling her infamous captivating smile, she winked before sprinkling kisses upon the red heads neck, this in turn causing her to moan out in pleasure as her free hand massaged her breast. Hearing such appreciative moans, she began to lick from her neck to the top of her ear, this in turn making Tilly arch her body into Jen's, repositioning her in between her legs in a state of need. Once satisfied with the reaction, Tilly watched on as Jen trailed her tongue from her neck and down the middle of her chest all the way to her waist band of her underwear. Looking down eagerly, Tilly felt like she was going to explode from such suspense, Jen had her on edge, and had teased her until the brink she could take no more. She needed her now. She looked down once more, her eyes being met with a mischievous smile as the brunette slid her pants off and began to trail her tongue down the inside of Tilly's thighs, paying so much attention to both detail and pleasure. Tilly couldn't help but unravel to Jen's touch, begging for her to give in to her needs. "Please Jen.." she moaned as her hands began to curl into fists as she felt the brunette's breath dust against her skin, her tongue edging closer, and closer..

"Tilly? Is that.. are you sleeping?" Maddie reprimanded, standing by the red head quizzically tapping her foot. Tilly sprung awake and took in her surroundings, beads of sweat began to gather on her forehead and her hands were trembling from her raised heart rate.

"What.. where?" She dazed, utterly confused at the situation, intensely agitated that everything she'd just imagined was all but a dream.

"Babe.. you're in the common room. How long have you been here? You really need to give yourself a break.." Maddie giggled as she helped Tilly up from the blue sofa, dusting down her outfit and repositioning the collar on her dress.

"Yeah, I really do.." Tilly stated, unable to hide her dismay as she came crashing back down to reality, feeling crushed that what she'd just imagined, was only but fictional.

"Wait! My exam, have I missed it?" Tilly began to panic as she grabbed her belongings, ruthlessly rummaging through her bag in search for her mobile.

"Wow.. Tils, calm down. Of course you haven't. It starts in 20 minutes. I was just searching for you, you've been rather odd lately." Maddie spoke, her face painted with a half-smile in blatant concern.

"Is there anything you'd like to tell me Tils? You know you can tell me anything.." Maddie asked, running her hand down her friends arms offering a reassuring smile. Now composed, Tilly looked on. She adored Maddie but she knew keeping this to herself was for the best. However much Jen knocked her back, she knew she simply couldn't jepordise any chance she had with the teacher, even on a friendship level. Making up her mind she shook her head before forcing a smile.

"Of course there isn't, you know what I'm like around this time Mads.. Typical post-exam stress, I'll get over it." Tilly reassured before turning to pack her things.

"Good. Anyway my gorgeous little ginger, I am off to grab a bottle of water, care to join?"

"Nah I'll catch up with you, have a few things here I need to take care of. See you in the exam, and best of luck!" Tilly smiled, suddenly craving solidarity in order to gather her thoughts. After all, she needed to after having such a detailed, exhillirating dream about her teacher, she was pretty sure her mind would never be able to concentrate in an exam after experiencing it. _What if I run into her today?_ She began to think, a sense of worry overwhelming her as her heart began to beat against her chest like a drum. Jen was the last person Tilly wished to bump into today, however, being in such a small college the odds were most definitely not on her side.

…

"The General Studies exam? Um.. yeah, Ok, that shouldn't be a problem." Jen chirped as she took the exam papers out of Mr Keeler's grasp, providing a reassuring smile while doing so.

"That's great Miss Gilmore, Mr Renton sends his apologies, I'm sure you'll be fine though…" Mr Keeler stated before turning on his heel and greeting a group of student's whom were entering the college grounds.

Jen began to quickly scan down the list of student's whom were sitting the exam that day when she gasped aloud and almost dropped the piece of paper from her grasp. Even reading that one name made her heart drop. _Tilly Evans. _Jen's eyes began to advert around, almost as if she was looking for the red head as her heart began to quicken when suddenly she heard a familiar voice come from the far corner of the hallway.

"Tils, I have some amazing news! I'll speak to you after the exam yeah? It's about Abersoch, I've told everyone to meet in College Coffee. Let's just say this summer is finally looking up!" Sinead beamed before entering the classroom for her exam, offering a smile to Jen as she did so whom stood in the doorway.

Finally finding the courage to look up, Jen cast a desperate glance towards Tilly whom was walking towards her. Her mouth fell open, almost as if words were due to follow but it never did prevail. Their eye's connected, Jen couldn't help but run her eyes along her body as she felt her breathing hitch however Tilly broke the gaze. Jen could sense the hurt and betrayal edged in her eyes and it pained her to see her like this. Dropping her head in shame and crossing her arms over her abdominal area she felt Tilly squeeze past her in the door, her body brushing against her own ever so gently making the butterflies in Jen's stomach work overtime. She was elated, breathless, and momentarily speechless as she watched the red head take her seat within the room. Finally snapping back into reality she began to reprimand the class on what was expected of them, highlighting examination conditions before commencing the exam and taking her seat at the front desk.

Turning her paper Tilly's mind suddenly hit a blank. The words on the page somewhat began to dance around as her mind became a blur. Sighing she collapsed her head in her hands. All these nights of non-stop revision and of course, breaking her heart over Jen had finally taken its toll. A silent tear began to drop down her face as she became agitated with herself before she felt a presence crouched beside her, their hand stretched over and resting on her own.

"Tilly.." Jen began, her eyes looking at her desperately in concern. "Do you need some air?"

Tilly couldn't bring herself to look into Jen's deep brown eyes, she was afraid she may be captured once more, instead, she opted for staring at their intertwined hands resting on the table. Unable to speak she simply nodded before getting out of her seat and making her way to the door, shutting it over before slumping against the wall outside.

A few moments later the door began to open and out stepped the beautiful brunette, carefully shutting the door behind her and casting a last glance through the window pane to keep an eye on the other students.

"At least this time you haven't thrown me out of your classroom ." Tilly stated cheekily, thinking back to the last time Jen had dismissed her to the principal's office when Jen turned to face her, her expression becoming serious as she edged her body closer to the red heads.

"I can't stay out here for long Tilly, I was worried about you.. you know I care I just-"

"It's fine, I don't wish for you to donate any more time to me than you would any other student." Tilly stated before turning away, her stomach up turning with an immense feeling of hurt.

"Tilly don't be like this, please just concentrate on your exam, I have something I need to tell you afterwards, it's pretty important." Jen pleaded, before casting a glance into the classroom checking the coast was clear before nearing herself towards the student. She ran her hand down Tilly's arm before she noticed Tilly pushing her away, breaking the embrace.

"Don't." she simply stated, mimicking the exact response Jen had provided when they'd last found themselves in such an embrace before pushing past her towards the door. Before entering Tilly stepped back, casting a glance towards the brunette who still stood in the same position. Holding back the tears which threatened to escape she composed herself before making her way into the classroom, feeling as dejected as ever as she took her seat and began her examination once again.

Throughout the 80 minutes Jen sat at the table at the top of the room, using the time given to go through marking she had to catch up on, every so often stealing glances up to a certain red head as she worked away. She paused before bringing her hand up to her mouth, crooking her finger over her ruby red lips before falling into deep thought. _How can I tell her? _She began to wonder, thinking of possible ways to break the news to the teenager that she'd accidently agreed to come on holiday with them. She began to worry as to Tilly's reaction, and knew she wouldn't blame her if she did react badly to the news. Gulping she looked down at her papers once again.

"This is such a mess." She whispered before projecting her attention onto the clock, hoping the time would draw nearer as her mind began to delve into despair.


End file.
